Gay Mormon Man Announces Sexuality in Blog, Stays Married to Wife
A Mormon man that is married to a woman and has three children announced he is gay in a blog post last week, the British newspaper the Daily Maile reported.
After writing an in-depth post in his blog, Josh Weed’s wife, Lolly Weed, did not demand a divorce or throw his clothes on the front lawn -- she remained married to him. The announcement was only a shock to some of the couple’s friends and family as Lolly knew that her husband was gay several years before they married.
The post explains Josh’s spiritual and physical relationship with his wife.
"Lolly and I have an extremely healthy and robust sex life," Josh, a marriage specialist, wrote about celebrating their tenth year being married to each other.
In the blog entry the devote Mormon, from Auburn, Wash., admits to never having sex with a man and says that he is gay and not bisexual.
"Some might assume that because I’m married to a woman, I must be bisexual. Sexual orientation is defined by attraction, not by experience," he wrote. "In my case, I am attracted sexually to men. Period. I’ve never been turned on by a Victoria’s Secret commercial in my entire life."
He also says he knew he was gay when he was around 11 or 12 years old and told his wife that he was gay on their first date -- he was just 16. Nevertheless, his wife wrote in the blog that she loved Josh for who he was as a person.
"I knew that I loved Josh... I wanted to marry Josh Weed because I loved the man that he was. I loved everything that made him him. I didn’t want anyone else," she wrote. "I knew that we had the kind of relationship that could work through hard trials and circumstances. I did not choose to marry someone who is gay. I have never regretted it."
He went on to say that even though he loves and is attracted to his wife he will never become bisexual.
"I have many, many years of experience which confirm this to be true, but it’s really as simple as what a girl asked me in junior high," he wrote. "’If everyone in this room took off their clothes, would you be turned on by the girls or the guys?’ My answer, which I didn’t say out loud, was unquestionably the guys"
Josh says he decided to publically come out because of his work as a marriage therapist.
"My clinical work as a therapist is taking me in the direction of helping clients who struggle to reconcile their sexual orientation with their religious beliefs," he wrote. "I have decided to be open with these clients about my own homosexuality, and in doing so have opened the door to people finding out about this in ways I can’t control."
Earlier this month Mormons showed their support for gay rights as more than 300 straight church members participated in the Utah Gay Pride Parade in Salt Lake City.
The Mormons who marched in the parade wanted to send a message of love to the state’s LGBT community. According to the event’s organizers this was the first time a large group of Mormons took part in the parade, organizers said.
A few years ago, Carol Lynn Pearson bucked the church by going public about her gay husband, whom she nursed during his final illness of complications resulting from AIDS. She wrote a book on the subject. She also wrote a groundbreaking play "Facing East," about how devout Mormon parents deal with the posthumous outing of their son who died of AIDS.
Many gay allies are joining an organization called Building Bridges, which seeks to promote LGBT acceptance inside the church. The leadership the Mormon Church in spearheading the successful passage of Proposition 8, which banned gay marriages in California, became a lightning rod for criticism of the church. Since then, the church has pulled back from such anti-gay political acts. Homosexuality, however, remains forbidden to believers.